“You’ve got to be before you can do and do before you can have.” Zig Ziglar
How many times do we say to ourselves: when I will HAVE this (a new job, more money, a better relationship, improved conditions, etc.), I will DO that and only then I will BE happy, more satisfied, more self-confident and so on. This way of thinking has also been emphasized by a society that every day tell us to HAVE IN ORDER TO BE. In reality, things don’t go that way, if we wait for external circumstances to change, we can spend a life in waiting for success or true happiness. The RESULTS we achieve in our lives are the consequence of the ACTIONS we take. The QUALITY of our actions depends on the quality of our WAY OF BEING: how we see things, our beliefs, emotions, intuition etc..
So, what can we do in order to achieve our objectives?
We should reverse the model HAVING → DOING → BEING into BEING → DOING → HAVING.
“If you want to have more, you have to become more. Success is not something your pursue. What you pursue will elude you; it will elude you; it can be like trying to chase butterflies. Success is something you attract by the person you become. For things to improve, you have to improve. For things to get better, you have to get better. For things to change, you have to change. When you change, everything changes for you.”
When we don’t get the results we want, there are the 3 possible ways we can follow:
- Do Nothing: we assume negative results are due to something outside our control and so we don’t do anything, obviously not the best option.
- Change our actions: this is what most people do. This problem solving mentality can help in the short term but after a while, if we keep thinking the same things, we will act the same way and get the same results.
- Change our way of being: when our perception, beliefs, mind maps and feelings change, we enormously enhance the probability of improvement and development. This is the only effective way to experience transformation. When WE CHANGE, we can produce unprecedented results and re-design our identity all the time.
No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. Albert Einstein
Now I have a KEY QUESTION for you:
IS THE WAY YOU ARE CURRENTLY BEING PRODUCING THE RESULTS YOU WANT?
If your answer is uncertain or negative, I give you an easy tool that can help start working on yourself. Take a paper sheet and divide it in 3 columns: BE, DO, HAVE.
Now start to write in the “Have” column what you want to achieve: for example a better relationship, a better job, a new house, to lose weight and so on. In the center column, identify the things that you have to Do in order to have the things listed in the right-hand column. For example for a career improvement you could write: work more, communicating better with the colleagues and the boss, send resumes, expand your network of contacts and so on. Please consider that everybody’s list varies because each of us has unique needs, beliefs, and interests. However, the formula remains the same. In the first column “Be” , describe what you have to BE in order to DO so that you can HAVE. In our example you could write to be: persistent, self-confident, communicative, committed, kind, thoughtful, considerate, responsible etc..
This easy formula can help to examine yourself and determine what kind of person you have to BE in order to DO so that you can HAVE. If you find this article useful, please share it with the people you care about ♥ Have fun and feel free to share your thoughts leaving your comments here below.
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4 thoughts on “Being, Doing and Having”
I find your article very clear and useful. I would therefore very much like to keep on learning more about this subject, thank you.
Hi Martine, thanks for your feedback, I am lately focusing more on giving workshops rather than writing blog posts but I have seen that you subscribed to the newsletter so you can receive the next updates about self development and spiritual growth. best wishes, Lorenzo
It’s easy to identify or know what ways of being would empower/inspire oneself to do that which will give them what they want to have. But the challenge stands with “being”….I can’t just choose to be courageous no matter how much I say to myself I am going to be courageous….physiologically my body gives in, my emotions take over etc. it’s like I am constrained in my ability to “be” anything other than who I am being now. So how does one get to expand on their capacity to “be” and “be” that permanently by choice?
Hi Viktor, I reply using another example as analogy.
Let’s suppose I am very slim and I would like to be more fit and to build some muscles.
I cannot just imagine that, I DO need to exercise, to eat better, to have a plan on how to do it etc..
The same applies in every field. If I want to “be” better, more courageous, more intelligent, etc. I DO need to “train”… and maybe ask the help of a coach 🙂
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